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It’s that time of year again - the endless barrage of adverts: diet products, gym memberships, expensive supplements, weight loss drugs and injectables and more. And let’s not forget the “psychological approaches” to weight loss - the ones that say “we’re-definitely-not-a-diet” when they most definitely are! The New Year comes loaded with expectations: to be better, fitter, healthier, more successful… and, of course, to BUY MORE STUFF. Businesses selling diet culture don’t care about your health, they care about making money. So here’s your friendly reminder: you don’t have to listen to any rules, “shoulds” or “musts” about your body in the New Year. Sometimes, the stress of trying to “improve” does more harm than good. Perhaps the aim can just be to show ourselves a little more kindness and compassion this year.  Post-Christmas guilt and shame For many, Christmas feels like a “free pass” to eat everything they want (especially if they were dieting/restricting before) and then they feel horrendous guilt afterwards. For others, they may have struggled to eat during this time, and others may feel pressure being around family and friends, trying to fit in and act “normal”. Often in January (or before January even starts) the guilt and shame can set in, triggering negative thoughts about your body and food. For some, this can lead to disordered eating or intensify existing struggles with food and body image. Whether you have an eating disorder, dislike your body, or have a complicated relationship with food—your concerns are valid. You don’t need a label or diagnosis for your struggles to be valid, you too deserve help and support. Diet companies – and by this I mean anywhere trying to sell you something to change your body – know that people feel guilt and shame in the New Year, and they prey on people's vulnerabilities and insecurities at this time. They sell thinness (and more so now “wellness”) as a cure to all problems and to bring happiness. But happiness is not dependent on your body shape or size. They’re selling a myth – it’s all a big scam. The diet culture cycle Diet culture works by failing. That might sound ridiculous, but if one diet worked and made everyone thin and happy, then everyone would do that one magical diet. Diets don’t work – this is shown through research and through the ongoing lived experience of many, many people. And it’s exactly this cycle of dieting not working that keeps people trapped as they move on to the next and the next. People always blame themselves - it’s their “lack of willpower”, their fault. And what does this bring? Even more shame. Then back around the cycle we go:  Copyright Mel Ciavucco - counsellor and trainer 2024 Diet culture is always there to hand you the next “cure”, the next thing that will “finally work”. But it won’t, and they know that. It’s how they make their millions. This is not your fault. Dieting is a horrible cycle and it’s such a difficult trap to get out of. Diet culture is, for many, the water we swim in – it’s been all around us since we were born. Beauty standards and body expectations seep into our subconscious and collective psyche as we grow up. It’s hard to switch off all those rules and expectations when so much of it is normalised. Body image and self-worth Attempts at changing your body or weight can sometimes be linked to deeper self-worth issues. When we’re sold an option to feel better about ourselves then of course it makes sense that we want to try it. The world can be a difficult place to live in, and many people have experienced difficult or traumatic things which may have impacted their self-worth. This can present as a need to change or fix ourselves, channelled into wanting to change our appearance or weight. It’s your body, your choice, always, but these changes can become all-consuming and bring a lot of anxiety and distress. It may also lead to disordered eating, or having procedures such as cosmetic surgeries. Here's the hard truth; if you don’t like yourself, you are unlikely to change that by losing weight or having surgery. You will likely just move on to the next thing you want to “fix”. Continuing to focus on trying to lose weight or change your appearance can just keep the cycle going, keeping you in misery and acting as a barrier to any real work that could be done to help your self-esteem and self-worth. But what about health? Weight loss often gets credited with health improvements but it’s more likely a side effect for some people. If you want to work on your health, then go for it, but try to shift the focus off weight. After all, health is about your mental health, sleep, stress and many other aspects. Movement can be for wellbeing, not for punishment. Find what you enjoy, if you can do exercise or movement, but also remember that this isn’t accessible for many people. Good health is not accessible to everyone. We live in human bodies that are destined at some point to be less able one way or another, through ageing or illness, so it isn’t always possible to stay healthy. Working on respect and kindness for ourselves is important, whatever your capacity for health. Health isn’t a moral obligation. You don’t owe anyone your health. You don’t need to look or dress a certain way for anyone else. You don’t need to comply with societal expectations, and you certainly don’t need to be funding a diet industry worth millions which exploits people’s insecurities. Body acceptanceLet’s be real: body acceptance isn’t easy, but neither is dieting. If you’ve spent years caught in the diet cycle, I get it. The pull of diet culture is strong, and it’s everywhere. But you deserve better. You deserve to feel better about yourself and have more respect for yourself. It’s fine if you don’t love yourself right now. Loving yourself is hard so maybe just aim for “I’m ok”. Some people find “body neutrality” helpful – working on feeling neutral about your body or not thinking about it much. We’ve all got better things to think about and to be doing! Dieting and worrying about your body takes up a lot of unnecessary energy and headspace. Building your self-esteem and self-worth We know that dieting is unlikely to have a positive impact on long-term mental health and wellbeing, it’s more likely to keep you in the cycle and do more harm than good. Instead, consider exploring the roots of your difficulties. This can be different for everyone, but it can help to consider childhood influences, family narratives, the impact of the media (including social media) and challenge the ways diet culture has negatively influenced your life. For me personally, I found that reading books (and engaging with other material) on dieting, body image and eating disorders was a great help in “un-learning” expectations and learning about my relationship with food and my body. I also had a lot of counselling too, which helped link my past to my present and also helped build my self-esteem and self-worth. As a qualified counsellor now, I am passionate about helping others do this too. I know that healing and recovery can happen from my own experiences and also through seeing the experiences of others. How to ditch diet culture in 2025
As we step into the new year, let’s make space for compassion, self-acceptance, and kindness, because you don’t need a “new you”. You’re already enough. Counselling can help explore body image and eating issues. If you’d like to find out more about about my online counselling services, click the button below. I’m running a workshop in January 2025 on diet culture in the therapy room. To find out more about this or other trainings/CPD, head to my workshops page.
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