Therapeutic Writing Exercises to Improve Body Image

Writing can be a powerful tool for exploring and processing emotions. As a writer and counsellor, I have experienced for myself how writing can be deeply therapeutic. We pour parts of ourselves into our words, even sometimes without realising it. Looking back, I can see that my early fiction writing was a way of processing my feelings and experiences, as well as my journalling. Writing blogs helped (and continues to help) explore themes like trauma, social inequalities, eating disorders, and body acceptance, which are central to my work.

Below are some suggested writing exercises that may help build self-compassion and improve body image. Some of these exercises are more structured than others, so do whichever ones feel right for you. The key is to write in a way that feels good or helpful, without any writing rules or pressures.

​Get rid of the “shoulds”

When it comes to body image and appearance ideals, there are often strong social and cultural narratives that tell us what we “should” or “shouldn’t” look like. These are based on appearance ideals which often centre on thinness, youth and whiteness (and muscularity for some). There can be pressures to fit into gender binaries – to look feminine or masculine in certain ways. Being thin is often seen as being “healthier” and more attractive (which is not the case) which can lead to “should” about losing weight and this can lead to disordered eating.
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If you struggle with negative thoughts involving words like should/shouldn’t and must/must not, these can be based on other people’s expectations/societal pressures.

Examples may include:
“You shouldn’t wear X at your age”
“You should lose weight”
“You must not eat X”
“Bigger people shouldn’t wear bikinis/crop tops/shorts (etc)”
 
“Not good enough” thoughts are another example:
“You’re not thin enough”
“You’re not clever enough”
 
All of these are critical thoughts and are not helpful as they often only leave you feeling worse about yourself. So if you’re struggling with any negative thoughts like these, get yourself some single sheets of paper (not in a notebook unless you’re ok with ripping the pages out).

Write down these negative thoughts and get them all out on the page….
AND THE RIP THEM TO PIECES! Or BURN THEM, if you can do so safely.
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This symbolically says to yourself how nonsense these thoughts are and how you don’t need them. Negative thoughts can get in the bin!
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​Reframe Negative Body Image Thoughts

Another way of dealing with critical thoughts is by reframing them.
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1. Start with one of your common critical thoughts and write this down under "Critical Thought" (as below) e.g. “I’m fat and ugly”. Acknowledge and observe this thought - it is from a critical part of you - that’s just one part. It’s unlikely to be your only narrative, as there is often another part that we can draw on that isn’t so mean.
2. For the second section, think about how that statement makes you feel. “Fat” isn’t really a feeling so it might be you’re feeling hurt, or sad, like a failure, embarrassed or ashamed. All of these feelings are valid, you’re allowed to have them.
3.  Reframe the thought, write some counter-thoughts which are kinder and more compassionate. If you struggle with this, you can imagine how a friend might respond.

An example:
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Critical Thought:                                  

“I’m fat and ugly”   

Feelings:                                          

 Sad, ashamed 

Counter-thoughts:                           

“I am loved and valued”
“My appearance is the least interesting thing about me”
“Being fat isn’t inherently bad”
“Fat isn’t a negative character trait”
“I deserve compassion”
“Our society has high beauty standards which are impossible to achieve”
“I don’t want to live my life trying to impress others”
“If others judge me on my looks then maybe I don’t want to be friends with those kinds of people!”
I deserve to feel good about myself no matter what my size”

 
You don’t have to write as many as that, I was just giving plenty of examples here to get you started.
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I wouldn’t suggest including “you’re not fat” as a counter-thought as it only serves to reinforce that being in a bigger body is a bad thing, when it’s not. People of all different sizes struggle with body image, which proves it’s not just about your size, it’s about your thoughts and feelings (though larger people experience higher levels of stigma and discrimination).

​The Unsent Letter

Sometimes people with body image problems have experienced bullying or teasing about the way they look. This might have been a kid at school, a teacher, a family member or a so-called friend. People's words stick with you from a young age.

So if you can recall somebody who made you feel bad about yourself, this one’s for you…
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• Picture that person if you can. Remember what they did or said and how that made you feel. It’s OK to feel angry or sad or whatever you need to feel.
• Now write them a letter, but don’t worry – you’re not going to send it! Say everything you’ve wanted to say, without holding back. Swear as much as you want or call them whatever you like – nobody is going to see this so just get it all out!
• The idea of this exercise is for it to feel cathartic and for you to get things off your chest. If it doesn’t feel great to you at any time, you can stop.
• This letter is for you, not the person you’re writing to. You can keep it, rip it up into tiny pieces, or burn it – it’s up to you.

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15-Minute Writing and Rewriting

If you’re struggling with a specific body image concern, or have mixed feelings/feel confused about something, try this freewriting and editing approach:
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1. Write about the issue for 15 minutes. Don’t think about it, just set a timer and go! Free writing like this can help release some of your worries but it may also bring some clarity to your thinking. This may be enough for you, just to get it out on the page, or you can continue the exercise.
2. After this initial writing splurge, take a short break. Then read what you wrote, and write about the exact same thing again. This may seem a bit weird, but writing about the same thing again can help you hone in on what the issue is and may help find a new perspective or a solution in some cases.
3. Then take a break, and if you can, repeat it a third time. You might find it is shorter and more succinct, having identified the issue more clearly and possible resolutions.

Check-in with yourself after – how was that beneficial? Do you feel any different now? Perhaps your perspective has changed?

​Journalling prompts

Journaling doesn’t have to be perfect or profound. You don’t need fancy words or structured entries, just write freely, without judgement. Try these prompts:
 

• What is one thing my body allows me to do that I’m grateful for?
• What messages about beauty and worth did I grow up with? Do I still believe them?
• If I could wake up tomorrow with a better relationship with my body, what would that look like?
• What are my values? What do I care about?
• When I’m at the end of my life, what do I want to be remembered for?

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Write a Letter to Your Younger Self

This exercise can be emotional but is powerful for self-compassion. Think back to your childhood when you started struggling with body image, or when you became aware of how your body “should” look. Maybe a comment from a family member, a doctor’s appointment, or an experience in school changed how you saw yourself.

Write a letter to your younger self – any age you like.

• What would you want to tell yourself?
• What encouragement would you give?

​When I did this, I started awkwardly, making jokes about being "Mel from the future," but soon realised how much I wanted to reassure the younger me that her worth was not tied to appearance and that it was not her fault.
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​Write about your experiences

Writing about your life can be a way to reclaim your story. If you’ve struggled with body image or eating problems, reflecting on your experiences can bring insight and healing. Sharing your story with others can bring hope. Writing blogs or stories can be a way to give back, to help others when you feel you’re progressing with your own recovery.
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Writing about past trauma can unearth deep emotions, so it may help to process these feelings with a therapist alongside your writing.

If you find you need further help with any of these exercises above, or if you find this sort of thing isn’t helpful for you, consider if counselling for body image might help. Check out my counselling page here for more info.
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A Final Note

For years, I worried about making my writing "perfect", but it really doesn’t matter. The pressure to start writing can stop us from starting at all – the pressure of the blank page! But your starting point is just to write what’s important to you and be authentic. Write what’s real, and write for YOU. It doesn’t need to impress anyone else. It doesn’t matter if it’s “good enough”, what matters is that it’s real and genuine, and meaningful.

Just give it a go!
 
If you’ve found any of these exercises helpful, please share with friends on socials!
If using or adapting these exercise on your own site or resources, please link back to this blog.
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I offer online counselling if you’re struggling with body image and I offer a free 15-minute initial chat. Contact me to arrange an appointment: 

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